Thursday, May 1, 2008

Eventfulnessless

Guys, I was serious about my running out of ideas. If you wish to see a post up everyday, as I know many of you do and I thank you for your continued interest in my writing, SUBMIT IDEAS SO I HAVE STUFF TO WRITE ABOUT!

So, before I continue with my LAST idea, I must insert this disclaimer to ease the minds of my readers…

Disclaimer: The following day did not actually happen, but it is a compilation of many snippets of days to make one big exciting day.

Now that business is taken care of, I can commence the writing!

Dalziel slowly climbed out of bed as his cell-phone alarm clock relentlessly played its “Energize” song over and over again in endless loops. He slowly turned the alarm off, headed off to the bathroom where he brushed his teeth, a habit which he had just only started a few months earlier as mentioned in the previous post. So, yes, Dalziel was actually brushing his teeth, now to skip other random boring details, he got on the bus after a small sprint as he rounded the corner to see his bus just pulling up.

So Dalziel entered school that morning, tired as always, but he was confident in his sneakiness that he would be able to sleep through his 1st two boring and unimportant classes. During history, gladly they were watching a movie, but Dalziel’s seat placement was horrible to find a good position to sleep in. He was in the 2nd row right in front of the teacher’s desk so he could not find the right angle in which he could position himself to hide from the teacher and sleep peacefully. Eventually, he slowly edged his desk over at a slight angle so he could place his head onto his desk and still be perfectly behind the student in the 1st row. Dalziel was pleased with his ninja-ness and quickly fell asleep to the low droning of the boring black and white history movie.

As time passed on and Dalziel continued sleeping, he was unaware that the teacher had noticed that his hair had disappeared from his vision. Obviously since Dalziel was sleeping, he could not hear the teacher slowly walk up and sit on the side of the classroom from where he could survey the whole class. And since Dalziel sat in the 1st column of chairs right in front of the teacher’s desk, he was in plain sight of the teacher who sat there quietly observing Dalziel’s back rise and fall rhythmically as he was fast asleep.

Then all of a sudden as if Dalziel had just been hit with a quick-attack from Pikachu, he snapped upright and rubbed the sleep away from his eyes. Then he noticed a presence behind him that was shaking, he turned around and saw his teacher sitting on the side of the room from where he could see everything and from where he had obviously seen Dalziel sleeping his class away. His teacher was stifling a chuckle, a stifled chuckle that scared the living crap out of Dalziel, he was sure his old crafty (<=someone notice the slight allusion) teacher had something horrible in store for him, but tried to hide his fear.

Then to his horror, his teacher walked back to the VCR and paused the video. With this break in class, Dalziel was sure that his teacher would do something horrid, but nothing happened except the ringing of the bell. Dalziel was saved, but as he left the room he glanced at his teacher who was chuckling to himself and looking at Dalziel with a slight glare in his eyes. Dalziel quickly walked out of his horrid history classroom and headed over to his statistics class which he thoroughly enjoyed.

His statistics teacher was a hilarious, bald man. And to accentuate his bald head, Dalziel was sure that his teacher waxed it carefully every morning. As Dalziel took his seat next to Alcaeus, his teacher walked in carrying his normal “Wisconsin” mug full of coffee, it seemed like every other day, but Dalziel was in for a surprise; a surprise much more shocking than that of his history teacher sneaking up on his sleeping body…

Okay I lied; there was no amazing surprise in Dalziel’s statistics class, but seriously. This is what happens when I run out of ideas guys. It’s boring for you to read, and slightly frustrating for me to write, but I will try to continue to in the life of Dalziel with basically no plot for your entertainment.

So the day went on, Dalziel went to Chem class, went through with the lab with the normal random discussions. Gamaliel whipped out his infamous “Ssswhhsshhhssss”s at every turn, and laughed hysterically at every single one no matter how extremely unfitting they were. For example, Tallara said, “What’s wrong with this salt?” (no she really didn’t , but I know you get it), and Gamaliel responds with a hearty, “SSSWHHSSHHHSSS! AHAHAHAHAHA LOLOLOLOLOLOL!oneone!!11!eleven!!1!!”. At this point, the rest of the lab bench just sat there watching Gamaliel laugh his silly little head off at what he thought was his own ingenuity, but really the lab bench was in awe at how hard Gamaliel tried to pull off “sswhhshhss’s” at every turn even when they don’t work.

Now we skip math class because there is no way for me to articulate the hilarious chaos that happens in Noethre’s class.

So onto Spanish. No matter how funny Sr. Davalengle was, when he got to actual class, he was boring to no end, so Dalziel often slept in his class as well. Dalziel had gone through Spanish class sleeping in plain sight many times before without incident and Sr. Davalengle seemed not to care and always seemed to only call on Dalziel while he was conscious. But this day was different, inside Sr. Davalengle’s hilarious little mind, he had developed the perfect plan to surprise Dalziel and crack a joke at the same time!

As the class went over the exercise together, Dalziel slowly drifted off, but Sr. Davalengle waited until he was sure Dalziel was fast asleep, just like Snorlax without a pokéflute on hand. Now when he was sure Dalziel was out like a light, he said, “Dalziel! Número tres, por favor!” (Dalziel! Number 3 please!), but since Dalziel was sleeping, this sound did not register in his brain. Again, Sr. Dalziel reiterated his choice in a respondent to the question, “Dalziel! Number three!” but yet again, Dalziel’s sleeping brain did not hear the sound waves emitted by his teacher. Finally on the third time, Dalziel’s brain registered the sound and sent the message quickly to his eyes to open and respond to the inquiry. He awoke and sleepily said, “Sorry. Lo ciento. Qué número?” To this Sr. Davalengle burst into dance singing, “Ohh, it’s that time of the day, where students sleep in class!” the class erupted in laughter and life went on.

Sorry for the disappointing post guys, but I’m flat out of ideas as of now. So I leave you with a link to techno music.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCV1fv-Ef_w

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Gamaleile actually pulls a ton of good ones, ass.